(A Garland of Songs)
Yāmuna Bhāvāvalī (The Ecstasies of Yāmunācārya)
Song Twenty Seven
The Last Hope for Deliverance
āmi to’ cañcala-mati amaryāda khudra ati
asūya-prasaba sadā mora
pāpiṣṭha kṛtaghna mānī nṛśaṁsa bañcane jñānī
kāma-baśe thāki sadā ghora
Oh my dear Lord Hari! I am most fickle-minded, completely bereft of proper etiquette and extremely insignificant. I always radiate an intense effulgence of jealousy and malice. I willingly perform sinful acts, I love to do harm to my well-wishing benefactors, and I am unnecessarily puffed up with false prestige. Ferociously vicious like a barbarian, I am vastly learned in the art of deceiving others. I am always obsessed under the control of lusty motives, which are my very breath of life.
e heno durjana ho’ye e duḥkha-jaladhi bo’ye
kemone e bhabāmbudhi pāra ho’ye nirabadhi
taba pada-sebā mile more
Being such a sinful rogue, I am completely submerged in this ocean of material tribulation as I aimlessly wander here and there in the vast ocean of birth and death. How will I ever be able to cross over this deep ocean of nescience and enter into the eternal service of Your divine lotus feet?
tomāra koruṇā pāi taba to’ toriyā jāi
amki e duranta-sāgora
tumi prabhu śrī-caraṇe rākho dāse dhūli-sane
nahe bhaktibinoda kātora
Only if I get Your causeless mercy, then I can certainly cross over this miserable ocean of suffering. Now, my dear Lord, Bhaktivinoda is humbly requesting You to kindly keep this servant as just one of the many particles of dust under the safe shelter of Your beautiful lotus feet… then I’ll be fully satisfied.
Thus Ends the First Chapter of Gītā Mālā
entitled ‘Yāmuna Bhāvāvalī’ (The Series of Ecstasies of Yāmunācārya)